There’s no guarantee that those who love us will never leave us, nor is it always true that those who leave us never loved us.
This thought came across my mind while I was walking from my office to the bus stop, and yes, I just quoted myself.
How many times have I mistaken leaving for neglect or abandonment? There are people who in my life who I wished stayed a little longer with me. Growing up I had this view that part of loving someone means that you will always be there for that person. I believed that I could always be there for the people that I love and expected that they would do the same. Once I felt the first stirrings that they were slowly drifting away from me, I would be bitter because I was feeling “discarded”.
But as years go by and different people pass through my life as through a revolving door, some might leave earlier than expected, while some might overstay their welcome, I realised that I have held on to a skewed point of view.
I refused to acknowledge that life is indeed full of changes and as I go through it, each season requires a letting go and a holding on. Each season will have its share of heartbreak and triumphs, a period of renewal and of breaking down. Some of our friends or loved ones were meant to be with us for a season, maybe because they had something to teach us or they had something to learn from us or both. There are people who we may be fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to spend and share our whole lives with. But most of the people we meet – those we’ll share drinks with, those we’ll work with, those we’ll attend a concert with – they will just be present for a season.
But it doesn’t matter if they’re here to stay or they’re just passing through. What matters is that in the moments spent together, we laughed, we cried, we learned new things, we experienced things for the first time. Most of all in that span of time where our lives overlappedwe displayed love and devotion.
I guess it all comes down to treasuring every moment we have with the people we hold dear in our lives. Not doubting their intentions or wondering how long they’ll stick around, but really to make every second count. It’s easy to dismiss every stranger and not take the effort to build a relationship because let’s face it, we long for that lifelong commitment whether in friendship or finding a partner. But unless we open ourselves to the NOW we won’t be even sure of an EVER AFTER.