Hello dear readers,
I know I have not regularly blogged for this year. But I quite like my pace now. This whole year has been a whirlwind of events leaving me with less and less time to create and write. The only times I have written were the times that a deadline was hanging over my head. Still, I am thankful for doors that have opened to me this year. Significant changes that make me feel that things are falling into place.
Being exposed to different situations and meeting a lot of interesting people – the path that I want to take has become clearer. For far too long I have either been stalling or treading slowly on a path that is not meant for me. Maybe because most of the people who are close to me are on the same journey and I know nothing outside of it. But as the years pass by, something inside of me has always struggled – though I feel that I am fulfilled and purposeful there’s also a nagging feeling that I am exerting my energies in a vision that is not mine.
Yesterday, I was talking with a good friend about how I want to take a different direction from them. Instead of the support that I expected, that friend implied that I was lowering my standards and preferred a life marked with mediocrity. I was deeply grieved and a bit offended. On the bus ride home I was trying to understand the words spoken to me – it was as if I was “giving up”, it was as if the only correct way to live was to take the path they had chosen.
I fought and reasoned myself on my decision to go with my heart, a decision that was marked with prayers and careful thinking. The plans I now have may not be the same with them, but my vision has the same goal. It’s sad when the status quo has been ingrained in someobody’s mind that any other approach is considered inferior.
If that friend had asked me of my plans or the dream that I want to see fulfilled, he will see that I wasn’t lowering myself to the ordinary nor the mundane. But instead I was shut down and had to take a defensive stance. I realize now that I must be prepared to the skeptical and cynical reactions and that there are sacrifices to be made to make my dream come true. Like the quote above said, I must be prepared to be alone and to endure failure.
Still, I am thankful for that conversation because more than ever, my resolve has gotten stronger. If we always accept every piece of advice given or unsolicited there will be no breakthroughs nor accomplished goals in our lives.
This is me signing off for tonight full of hope and filled with dreams!